"Can We Not?" Volume Seven: Kane

For close to twenty years, Kane has been a part of the WWE. And for close to twenty years, he's, at the least, sniffed at the main event scene. And for about five of those twenty years, WWE fans have been saying but one thing to Kane's apparent vice grip on the upper midcard.

It hasn't been "we're scared." It hasn't been "Oh, my God! Don't do it."

It's been "please retire."

Yet, here we are again, in late 2015, and a returning Kane has injected himself, again, into a main-event feud. This time, during the closing seconds of Night of Champions, Kane killed any chance of a Sheamus MITB cash-in by attacking not only Sheamus, but Seth Rollins as well. It's like we got into the Wayback Machine and landed in 1997, 1998, 1999--you see where I'm going with this, or should I say "when?"

"When" we're going today, Sherman, only God knows.

Now, I'm a big fan of Kane's earlier work, and Team Hell No managed to work to levels no one could've seen. But, each time he returns these days, he manages to take every good part about his legacy, about his character, dump on it, reheat it and serve it out so we can say "oh, hey. It's Kane! Let's jump for joy for yet another 'go-away-heat' garnering moment where Kane, for no rhyme or reason, runs roughshod through everyone--only to get thwarted by John Cena/Roman Reigns/a face Seth Rollins/a cashing-in Sheamus.

No thanks. Plus, that wig.